So how does one take control of ones emotions?
As opposed to the diagram in the first part of this article, here the dominant negative emotion is reigning supreme. The divine voice or guardian soul has been forced to shrink to a small compartment. The result of this is that this negative emotion is ruling you now instead of the calm guardian voice.
Our emotions take the better of us in more ways than one. Every emotion demands a certain price that we land up paying at the cost of our inner self. Once that inner self of yours is given away as ransom, it takes days, maybe years to replenish it.
Is it worth it? Obviously not. Its so not worth it. You deserve better, than being a slave to your emotions.
Elevate yourself, be the master.
He got so angry when he realised that his wife of several years, is having an affair. Waiting impatiently for her to come home, he thought that he could kill her. Hours ticked by until the door sprung open. There was a certain spunk in the way she had been walking, for the past few days, he thought to himself. She had been unusually happy and wouldn’t get angry on small things like she always did. These were pointers and cursed himself for not picking up these clues earlier.
She entered, the anger on his face was enough for her to know that all was not well. She asked him if everything was alright and he said no. He told her that he had found out that she was cheating on him and asked her if it was true. She replied in the affirmative. After hearing this, the anger that surged inside of him, knew no bounds. The curses, abuses and the violence were only the resultant of the anger that had gripped him.
She was laid up in hospital for next 8 days because of the injuries inflicted upon her by her husband.
She knew she had wronged him and he knew that he could have handled it in a more mature way but actions once executed, cannot be undone.
After being in a bad relationship for more than a decade, this was probably the last nail in the coffin and they decided to call it quits.
In this story things were handled badly. This was a classic case of pent up anger and disappointment with each other which blew up when it could hold no longer.
To let it come to this phase, itself is something I would call ‘displaced settlement’. The time when things had started going awry in the their relationship, they should have tried to put things in place. Most us wait and presume that things will work out eventually. But for that ‘EVENTUALLY’ to happen, each one of us has to make efforts. Part of putting in that effort is to learn to manage emotion.
Managing emotion does not mean suppressing it, neither does it mean blowing up at the drop of a hat. It means letting emotion have exactly the place that it deserves. It should be a small compartment inside of you, until you deal with it and the key to that is to have the controls of this compartment in your hand. What I mean by your hand is the guardian voice/ guiding light/ soul/ universal energy within us. The more we elevate this energy within us, the more stability we achieve.
This voice has to be encouraged only then will it be able to grow, the more we listen, the more it grows. Once it comes into robust health, and gains the necessary maturity, it takes over from us and then there’s no looking back.
He was a single parent, a loving father and a thinking person. He would want to better himself in every area, be it home, office, children or relationships. He would learn from every mistake he made and incorporate those lessons in his life. He had the realization that his thinking and actions had a direct impact on the life that he was leading. This approach led him to better and more peaceful times in his life, but there were still certain traits in him that he desperately wanted to improve upon. He was unable to reign in his anger at times. He would get angry with his children for minor reasons and he knew that he needs to change that. His children used to wonder, about why their father just flies off the handle while being calm 99% of the times. Small mistakes solicit, small reactions, he realised this and decided that things needs to change because he is creating an imbalance in their lives.
Every time he felt the anger surge in him, he would stop for that second and call upon his guardian voice to guide him. AND IT DID. He started showing improvement in this area of his life also. He started realising that the moment you give the guardian voice its due, the reigning negative emotion gets a miniscule place in the scheme of things. That’s what I mean by compartmentalizing. You don’t have to do much, it happens automatically. All you need to do is summon this guardian voice and the rest will be taken care of.
Reigning in these negative emotion will also give you closure instantly. I am not telling you to suppress it. I am telling you to call upon your guardian voice that not just gives negative emotion a back seat but with closure. You will see yourself being guided with explanations. All the answers will come from within you, if you just wait that millisecond before reacting to situations.
About the Author – Rashmi Joshi aka “Moksha”
Having meandered through life doing what I was ‘SUPPOSED TO’, I finally realized my calling- writing about how to derive those all important lessons that our souls were meant to. Fuelled by the desire to ‘learn as I lived’ had me writing original quotable quotes by grade 8.
I hold a masters degree in Labour Law, an MBA in HR and along side trained in classical singing, which I pursued for 24 years.
I have written a book on Practical Philosophy that helps people learn to live successfully, make wise choices and get rich by earning pearls of wisdom.
